Tuesday, March 17, 2009

Bash Street Kids: Kumite Night III

I had intended to publish this last week but felt like a big bit of cod in a Catford chip shop- battered. Of course it wasn't that bad, but I am basically a superannuated salariman.

This is what I wrote on Friday night, feeling a bit under the weather:

Well, the small knocks that you pick up in kumite are starting to rack up; on Friday I went to they gym at 07:00 to try to shake off the feeling that I was actually a stack of broken crockery find that I can't now do fukkin (situps): nice set of brown patches over my chest and ribs these days.

Kinetic Kimura and Kokushin Kicks
Thursday's Kumite was dominated for me by two themes- Kimura and Kyokushinkai. First of all, Kimura chan, who works for YS bodyguard/security company, is steadily being weaned off Kokushikan University sports karate. This means that she needs to learn to really start hitting people. To do this she needs a large target to practice on:
..."PAUL SAN..."

YS is piling the pressure on her because she is used to sports karate and tapping people with big kiais and hikite to impress judges to score points. None of this will wash in the KWF, where you have to hit people- with control of course.

On the other hand this was good toughening up training for me because YS didn't let her off the hook while she was steaming in (in the first set of practices, the aite can't evade or block)..."deeper!" "NONONONO" "LONGER" "NONONO, HIT HIM!" until she was knocking me back each time- that's 50kg of motivated figher slamming into me. YS noticed I was wincing or staggering after each one, so then he said to her "NOW JODAN!" I looked at YS to say "I am up for it," Kimura looked at him in horror, YS said Yame, and we moved onto MY turn ;-).

I suppose this is all to cover for the fact that I was battered up by a 50kg woman. Which goes to show you how effective a proper oi-zuki is.

Kickboxing Time
We have a really nice guy training with us called Faisal Zakariya from Sudan who fights K-1, Shido-Kan, Kyokushinkai type fights and likes to learn from YS, who likes him because he is (a) polite and (b) very, very big (he must be 110kg) so great practice for Otsuka Sensei (about 60kg). You can see the sort of thing Faisal gets up to here! 

As you can see, Faisal is fan of YS spinning techniques. I can't resist putting a couple up here. I've had a couple on the ribs- an experience I won't forget in a hurry. 

So it was quite funny when they squared up for Shiai- Faizal doing all these sort of Kyokushinkai things so Otsuka Sensei just smashed into him with oi-zuki. It reminded me a bit of the scene with Naka Sensei in Kurobi playing the character of "Taikan" vs. that bloke who does all the kicks and Taikan just oi-zukis him on the chin. The scene I am referring to is here. But of course, Otsuka Sensei is a gentleman. 

YS keeps on telling Faizal that if he only learned how to use his body, he'd be really incredible, but Faisal's world is a very different one. We occasionally have people from Kokushinkai or related organizations over, usually by introduction, without a problem. You find that quality people are quality people who understand etiquette and appropriacy, no matter what their style is. We've even done Kyokushin style kumite to accommodate guests, on occasion. It's so radically different and I instinctively want boxing gloves!

Butting Heads 
A-HEM. Which brings us back to...At last I had my chance to show what sort of stuff I was made out of during Shiai, when YS lined me up against...you guessed it....Kimura chan! Actually no- the real story is that YS likes to use Pieter and I as sort of charging gaijin against more skillful fighters so they can experience what it's like to have big "enthusiastic" foreigners have a go at them.

Kimura is so fast and I am so slow that she can hit me, go back to the edge, have a glug of iced lemon tea and check her makeup before I even guess what's going on...but this time I wasn't going to have it. I said to myself, "Paul son, show a bit of pride here" so I tried to imagine myself on "fast forward" and low and behold, I didn't do too badly on the first couple of exchanges. But when I physically picked Kimura chan up on her feet like a gentleman, she gave me a dirty look. Oh-oh, I thought to myself, I'm up for it.

Then the next move in we were locked together. YS stopped and called "Yame" and said, so what do you do now?" Well, there was no option for it- the "Glaswegian Kiss." I have never headbutted a woman before, and the sight of an indignant Kimura chan so inviting close to me was irresistible. "GOKKKU!!" The sickening sound of bone on bone.

While it was perfectly controlled, a sort of silence settled over the dojo. Ishigoro Sempai giggled and I looked at YS, who had a broad grin over his face. "IPPON!" he shouted.

But you should have seen the look on Kimura chan's face- it would have curdled milk. It certainly scared the hell out of me!


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